I know I promised to write about my Mom's passing but to be honest, I don't know if it's something I can do. The final days I had with my Mom were so hard but so amazing to be able to watch her overcome her final trial. I miss her so much. sometimes I feel like I'm already forgetting what she looks like and that scares me. I've been trying so hard to keep it together for the sake of Dad and my sisters. I think I've only broke down once. I know it isn't the healthiest thing to do but really I'm doing OK. Yesterday and today have been hard because I haven't felt very well and every once in a while I think to myself that maybe I am depressed on the inside. But I just shut that door and move on. What else can I do? I'm so busy with the boys and ride Idaho, and Dad, and everything else that, I don't have time to take for me. Does that sound awful "Sorry Mom I don't have time to grieve over you because I'm too busy" I haven't even be able to bring myself to writing in my journal. I know it needs to be done so I will try sooner then later. But this week I have to get the courage and bring out all of Moms pictures and personal things and put them all into a scrap book.That isn't going to be easy. But for tonight I'm going to take a shower, get all dressed up and go out to dinner with my bestest friend in the whole wide world. We're going to eat lots of steak fries and drink lots of Dr. Pepper and maybe even some ice cream.

Gotta love boys
~Carey :D